The Amorconozkentia Incantation
by Elliot Pole
Summary: Ginny likes Luna. Luna likes Lavender. Lavender likes Ginny. Will any of them ever be satisfied?
1. Chapter 1

**The Amorconozkentia Incantation**

**Chapter One**

"Ginny!"

The redhead turned. The speaker was someone she did not care much for. Her brother's girlfriend. Ugh.

"Yes, Lavender?"

"Do you know why Ron is ignoring me?"

_Maybe because you are annoying_? Ginny thought. "I don't know. Ask Harry. He's friends with my brother, not me. I don't ask him about his love life."

"I thought that since you're related, you might know through intuition or something."

"Well, I don't. Now, goodbye."

Ginny hurried off, ignoring Lavender's cries behind her. How her brother ever got stuck with such an insufferable girlfriend she did not profess to guess.

When she got to Charms class, she flashed a smile in Luna's direction. Luna returned with her own wry smile. But Luna could not know the reason for Ginny's smile. It wasn't just to be friendly.

"Today we will be practicing Heart-Key Charms," said Professor Flitwick. "These Charms reveal a person's deepest desire. Or at least they would if they were fully mastered. Most wizards have not mastered them; in fact, so few do. However, potential is the key here, and if anyone in this classroom can master the Heart-Key Charms, it would be nice to see them do it."

A girl raised on her hand.

"Yes, Olliwot?"

"If you please, sir, wouldn't it be better to wait until we've attained N.E.W.T. level to teach us this?"

"Alas, it would seem so, wouldn't it? But no, it would not. You have to start as early as possible if you have any hope of attainting the Heart-Key Charm mastery. It takes an entire lifetime to pull it off."

Ginny raised her hand. "Have you accomplished it, sir?" She was surprised that she could ask so confidently when the reason her heart was palpitating was sitting so close…

"Yes, I am proud to say that I have mastered the Charm. It took an awful long time. In fact, it was less than ten years ago when I finally achieved it. I placed it on a mirror.."

"The Mirror of Erised!" Luna exclaimed. Ginny found this fitting since if she looked in the Mirror of Erised she would see…but that was silly. She shouldn't think of this now.

"That is correct, Miss Lovegood. I used it on the Mirror of Erised along with Dumbledore. We had to combine our powers to effect the Charm upon the mirror. Actually, just between us, I think Dumbledore could have done it himself, but he asked for my aid."

The class still seemed stunned that they would be practicing a Charm that wizards much older than them couldn't master.

"I know it's a little daunting, but we've got to try," Flitwick said. "Now, everybody up.

Ginny stood up, her hand brushing Luna's sleeve.

"Choose a partner."

Ginny reached for Luna's hand. "Partners?"

"Always," Luna said.

Flitwick was glad to see that not only Gryffindors paired with Gryffindors, or Ravenclaws with Ravenclaws. In the past, he had encouraged this, but since the war was going on, he much preferred it this way.

He only hoped that his students would live through this war. And the Order would triumph with as few deaths as possible…

"Um, Professor?" said the student called Ollicot.

This shook him out of his reverie. "Hmmm, yes. To perform the Heart-Key Charm, you must point your wands at your partner's aorta."

"Our what?" Ginny whispered.

"It's a part of the heart," Luna said. "Don't worry. Just point your wand in the general direction of my heart, and you should get it."

Ginny did so, though the idea made her sick. What if she thought of a non-verbal spell like the Killing Curse by accident? Could the Killing Curse harm anyone if it was done non-verbally? Could she even cast a non-verbal spell, having not been trained in it yet?

"The caster must close their eyes and picture the Elysian fields."

"The what?" Ginny asked Luna

"Just pastureland, meadows, Dirigible plums…whatever brings you peace."

Ginny could only think of one thing that brought her peace, or one person, that was. And she was standing right in front of her.

She shut her eyes and thought of Luna, how her heart kept skipping a beat every second that she was in her presence.

"Now say the word _Amorconozkentia_ to cast the spell. And try not to think of any fruit."

Of course, now that he said that, Ginny could think of nothing _but _fruit. She imagined bananas dancing with oranges and pears at a cotillion. When she tried to shake the image from her mind, she could only think of strawberry shortcake. And she wasn't sure she said the word right. Anyway, it didn't _sound _like anything happened.

"You're all thinking of fruit, aren't you?" Flitwick asked.

"If you please, sir," asked Ollicot, "why is thinking of fruit bad for this spell?"

"Because fruit clogs desire. This is why grown men drink wine. Because by drinking wine or other fruit-flavored drinks, they do not have to worry about their failed dreams."

Ginny tried the spell again, but she was now imagining blueberries in a figure-skating competition, with a pineapple, a grapefruit, and a peach with score cards ready.

"That's enough for the first try," Flitwick said. "Now you may open your eyes, and your partner will take their turn."

Ginny thought that Luna looked like she was ready to be kissed when she shut her eyes. Of course, she couldn't actually go over and kiss her. Not with half of the class watching. And anyway, Luna wouldn't want it. Would she?

"_Amorconozkentia_!" Luna exclaimed.

The first time she said it, nothing happened. But the second time a tiny wish of purple emerged from her wand.

"Congratulations, Miss Lovegood," Flitwick said. "You have mastered the ability to block fruit from your mind."

Luna opened her eyes. She had not seen the purple wisp, so she did not know what caused Flitwick to be aware of her strength in locking out the fruit from her mental strayings.

"I think that's enough for today," Flitwick said. "Class dismissed."

In the hallway, Ginny asked Luna what she had done to block fruit from her mind.

"Oh, I just thought of important things like Wrackspurts and Crumple-Horned Snorcaks. And I imagined that Nargles had got me. I don't know where I misplaced my radish ears, but since radishes are a fruit, it is probably a good thing I didn't have them."

Ginny chuckled. "You know, I really love you."

Luna stared at her.

"Not…I mean…I just think that you're fun to be around, some of the things you say…other people wouldn't say them if they did believe in them."

"People shouldn't hide from what they believe in. They should wear it on their sleeve."

And with that, Luna walked off. Ginny wished Luna could have remained with her. But she did have Quidditch practice anyway, so…


	2. Chapter 2

**The Amorconozkentia Incantationl**

**Chapter Two**

Luna felt abashed. The person she wanted to talk to most in the world was hung up over her hospitalized boyfriend. That is, using a word she had heard Hermione say. To her it just meant he was in the infirmary.

In a perfect world, Hermione would have been with Ron and Luna could just approach Lavender, see if they had anything in common. They probably didn't; Luna had once started talking about Crumple-Horned Snorkacks and how killing them was a part of the Ratfang Conspiracy. Lavender had just stared at Luna as if she came from another world. She didn't understand any of that stuff.

But that didn't mean Luna and Lavender were incompatible. Maybe Luna couldn't talk about Nargles ot Wrackspurts with Lavender. But there were other things the could discuss. And even if there weren't they did say that opposites attract. That was the hope Luna had to hold onto. That Lavender wouldn't dismiss her just because of a little difference in belief.

Their names even matched, with the first letters of both their names being L. They could be double L. Luna and Lavender. Lavender and Luna. Would you paint that moon Lavender? It's the most sparkling color in the world.

Luna's heart filled to bursting every time she thought of Lavender. But see, even if Lavender could like a girl, would she want to date a girl younger than her? Lavender was in Harry's year. She'd probably laugh in Luna's face if Luna suggested they spend an hour together at Hogsmeade or something.

Maybe she could patch Lavender's relationship with her boyfriend. She knew it was on shaky grounds, and even though she thought Hermione and Ron belonged together more than Lavender and Ron, it was probable that Lavender would be grateful to Luna for getting her and Ron's relationship up to notch. All Luna had to do was get them together in the infirmary and get Ron to talk. How hard could it be?

"Ron, it's just me, Luna. I brought you something."

Ron opened his eyes. "Oh, hi. Nice to see a friendly face."

"I hear you see a lot of friendly faces."

"But none as friendly as yours."

"You flatter me," Luna said. "Anyway, I brought you something."

She handed him a green amulet in the form of a monkey.

"This is great. What is it?"

"It's a Simian Broach. Keeps one safe from Vignapples."

"What are Vignapples?"

"They're apples with teeth that go out at night and bite people on the feet, infecting them with gangrene or frostbite."

"Sounds frightful. Thanks for giving me something to keep them at bay."

"You're welcome," Luna said. An awkward pause. Then: "There's someone else who wants to see you."

"Who?"

"Someone who has missed you."

"Oh. Er, I can meet with them if you remain here, Luna."

She didn't really want to stay, but she could see Ron's need in his eyes. She assented. "So I have permission to let her in?"

"Of course," Ron said.

Ron watched the door to the infirmary, and was surprised to see Penelope Clearwater walk in.

"Fancy seeing you here," Ron said. "When Luna said someone who missed me wanted to see me, I didn't think she meant _you_."

"Don't be silly," Penelope said. "I'm not here to see my ex-boyfriend's little brother. I'm here to see my sister, Emma."

Penelope strode over to a bed at the far side of the room, where a girl with blond curls lay. She looked like she had gotten whomped by the Whomping Willow.

The door to the infirmary opened again, this time presenting Ginny.

"You're the one who missed me? Figures. The girl who wants most to see me right now is my sister."

"I'm not here to see you," Ginny said. "Though I suppose I should give you the chocolate treacle that I saved from the feast last night."

"There was a feast last night? And me here and unable to enjoy it…"

Ginny pulled out some treacle from her bag.

Ron stuffed it into his mouth. Ginny found this revolting and turned her head.

"So, why are you here, then?" Ron asked, after consuming the last ounce of treacle.

"To deliver a message to Luna," Ginny said. "Professor McGonagell wants to see you."

"I'll go to her directly."

"Wait, Luna. You said you'd stay." Ron gave her a puppy dog look.

"Ginny's here now. She'll be suitable company."

"I didn't come here to stay by my brother's sickbed," Ginny said. "But it I must, you owe me, Luna."

"How shall I make it up to you?"

"Practicing the _Amorconozkentia _Charm."

"When?" Luna asked. She was very eager to do this. Maybe she could figure it out and use it on Lavender to figure out how to win Lavender's heart.

"Well, I have Quidditch practice all this week and then the game on Saturday. How about Sunday? We can use an empty classroom."

"Count me in," Luna said. Then she left the infirmary.

Lavender slammed into her in the hallway. She apologized and looked flustered. Twisting her hair, she said, "Is he ready?"

"Yes. Ginny's in there."

"Oh really?" Lavender asked. She seemed more eager to enter the room now than previously, though Luna could not figure out why. "Well, I guess I better go try."

"You do that." Luna patted Lavender on the arm, hoping that Lavender would take it as a kind gesture, which she seemed to. Then she entered the infirmary.

Luna listened for a bit, and it sounded as though Ron had faked being asleep again. She expected Lavender to emerge, angry at her. She would be happy seeing Lavender show any emotion toward her, even anger. But Lavender did not come out. After ten minutes, she decided to go see Professor McGonagell.

"Would you be willing to commentate at a Quidditch match?" Professor McGonagell asked her.

"Sure," she said. "You can count on me."

At the Quidditch match that Saturday, Luna sat with a magically amplified microphone held aloft in front of her. She started speaking about the clouds and stuff, and every time Zacharias Smith missed throwing the Quaffle in, she said he had "Loser's Lurgy."

Her mind wasn't on the game, however. It was on Lavender. Her skin, her hair, her lips. Oh those lips! To touch them, to feel them, to taste them! But she only wanted Ron to taste them, dammit. Didn't she realize that a great girl was sitting right here, at the commentating table? And the excuse that she might not like girls didn't fly with Luna. Sure, she had a boyfriend, but she had seen her snogging a picture of Hannah Abbott once. She was certain that she didn't like Hannah now. But the fact remained that at one point, Lavender had had a crush on the Hufflepuff girl. So why couldn't she like a Ravenclaw?

Suddenly the big robust fellow whom Hermione had invited to Slughorn's Christmas party sent a Bludger in Harry's direction. Luna shouted at Harry to look out but it was too late—Harry plummeted to the ground, hurt. He could not continue in the game.

When Luna saw the inept Quidditch player later, she noticed Ginny was there, yelling herself hoarse at him. "Do you not realize that you cannot give tips for improving someone else's game when you are actually _playing a game_? That is for practice only. Not to mention that your suggestions cause our Captain to be incapacitated."

"I was just trying to demonstrate the proper use of a beater's stick."

"Any way that keeps a Bludger from hitting our team members and causes them to hit the opposing team is a proper use. But hitting our own members is _not _a proper use."

Ginny slapped the boy across the head.

"You just hit me!"

"You don't count as a suitable member, so I think it's safe for me to show you what you deserve."

Then Ginny muttered a spell under her breath, her wand poking out of her robes. Instantly an army of bats fell upon the boy's face, seeming to consume it. He shrieked and ran from the Great Hall.

Ginny then strode over to the table where pumpkin juice was. Luna went over to her.

"This should have been a victory game," Ginny said, sipping her pumpkin juice.

"If Zacharias Smith weren't on the Hufflepuff team, I would say that the Hufflepuffs need to win at _something_. But he is there."

"Good one about the 'Loser's Lurgy.'"

"He is an awful sport, isn't he?"

"Yes, he most definitely is."

"He was the only member of the D.A. I didn't like."

"What about the Edgecombe girl?"

"Well, I don't really count her. She wasn't part of the D.A., not really. Anyone who betrays an organization isn't ever a part of it. Like this guy who was in the Ratfang Conspiracy and then gave my father an article about it. He can't shut it down himself, but he can inform the world. He cannot be castigated as a member of the Ratfang Conspiracy because by betraying it, he is showing he was never really a part of it."

"That's a pretty neat way of thinking," Ginny said.

As Luna walked out of the Great Hall, she saw something that made her heart skip a beat. Lavender Brown was lip-locking with Zacharias Smith! It was odd enough that the Hufflepuff boy wasn't celebrating his victory in his common room. But for the boy she despised to be kissing the girl she loved…she felt like her heart had been rent in two, then sent down the Isle of Wight. Then swallowed by an alligator, who was in turn swallowed by a Crumple-Horned Snorkack.

Crumple-Horned Snorkacks were relatively nice creatures. If you wanted them, you could call them by giving out a simple hum. You had to be in their country of origin, however, and they had to think that your need for them was sincere.

Luna wanted the image of them kissing out of her head. She had something that should work. A pudding made from the flesh of gulping plimpies. It tasted like butterscotch and acted like Lethe on the mind.

When she got back to the room she shared with four other Ravenclaw girls, she ate some of the pudding. One of the other girls came into the room and gave her a snort of disgust while Luna licked the spoon. Then she left. Luna tried to not let the fact that her other roommates didn't like her bother her too much. So long as Lavender liked her, she was happy. But at this moment, Lavender didn't seem to. She had been kissing some boy Luna didn't want to think about. Who was it again? Ron? No. Ron was okay. She wouldn't be mad at Lavender for kissing Ron. Wait, was she mad at Lavender? Perhaps she was only mad at the boy who had been kissing her. Let's see, who was it? Oh yes, the boy who had hit Harry with the Bludger…

Luna felt her forehead. She felt a little queasy from the puddng. There was only one boy it would be worse to see Lavender kissing than that McLovin' fellow. And his name was Zacharias Smith.

Suddenly it came back to her. Zacharias Smith had been the one Lavender was kissing. The plimpie pudding hadn't helped her drive it from her mind.

Luna felt rage rise within her, a feeling she had never experienced before. She emitted sparks from her wand, and went over to the poster of the Weird Sisters hanging over the bed of the roommate who had just come in and walked out. She burned a hole in the center of the face of the lead singer. Clarissa would notice it of course. But Luna didn't care. She was going to win Lavender's heart, if it meant fighting off a herd of thestrals and even You-Know-Who himself.


	3. Chapter 3

**The Amorconozkentia Incantation**

**Chapter Three**

I stop Ginny in the hallway to ask her to talk to her brother for me. He pretends to be asleep every time I enter the infirmary. I know he is pretending; I just don't know why. I gave him the sweetest necklace for Christmas. He should be mine forever, wearing that necklace. I know that if he'd just wear it, he'd know that we're soulmates. How hard is it to do that?

And then I notice that Ginny is wearing it. Does she not know the curse that is inflicted upon the wearer of that necklace if they weren't the intended recipient? It means that they will always have hardship in love. Good gosh, she is really unversed in jewelry mythology. Otherwise she wouldn't be wearing it. I'm sure she wants to find love. Though maybe she doesn't. She dumps boys as soon as she's had her fill of them. Michael Corner, Dean Thomas…well, she was still dating Dean but the rumor mill said that she wouldn't be for long. I wonder who her next prey will be.

I don't get a chance to warn her about the necklace before she waves me off. Besides, it might be too late. If she has worn it for more than twenty-four hours, the effects will be permanent. Maybe I should send her a warning by writing it down on a parchment and having one of those third-year delivery people take it to her. Nah. She's too eager to get away from me. I don't know why, though. Furthermore, I don't know why I feel a queasy feeling in my stomach after she has gone. Maybe I had something at lunch that doesn't agree with me.

And then anger rises within me at Ron for giving the necklace I gave him to his sister! That is a total disregard for my feelings for him, for the special connection we have. He is being unfair. Add that to his pretend sleeping and I don't ever want to see him again.

But I do go to the infirmary again after Defense Against the Dark Arts. I hate Professor Snape. He always yells at me for doing my Divination homework during his class. Does he not realize that Divination is the only class that matters anymore? Well, I don't mind Charms too much…but Defense Against the Dark Arts? The only good teacher I had ever had for that course was Harry Potter himself, and even _he _couldn't coach me well enough to make a Patronus. I still don't know what animal form my Patronus takes. I really want to know. But I am not willing to practice it for Snape's class. Figuring out how a shift in Saturn's position can affect my life is far more important than the garbage he is teaching us. Besides, he expects us to do non-verbal spells, which I still cannot master. At least in Divination, we don't have non-verbal spells because there is no wandwork there. As Professor Trelawney says, you either have the skills for Divination or you don't.

Ron is laying there, still pretending to be asleep. "Can you hear me, Won-Won?" I ask, pretending that I don't know that his ruse of slumber is just that…a ruse. "I saw the necklace you gave your sister. I don't approve of you giving it to her, but I will not try to rule your life. Just speak to me. Please."

He continues to keep his eyes shut. Does he think this is a game? Because it isn't funny.

"I bet you prefer hanging out with that Hermione chick," I say. "Instead of with the girl who loves you."

He ignores me. I want to punch him, but I could never do that. Punching is for boys. Muggle boys, no less. Wizards have their own method of dueling.

"I'm leaving you for now, but I'll come back later," I say. He continues to ignore me. I walk backwards out of the infirmary, hoping that he'll show sign of life, but he doesn't.

Once outside, I rush to the girl's bathroom to cry. Unfortunately, I choose the wrong girl's bathroom.

Moaning Myrtle is in there. She floats around me as I blub, and I try to yell at her, but I can't because my throat catches from the buildup of crying. Or I'm so hurt that I can't make any discernible noises, apart from the sound of my rushing tears.

"Myrtle knows what it's like to not be loved," says the ghost.

I still cannot say anything. I try to rise but the emotional impact of Ron's ignoring me weighs me down. Not the impact itself, actually, but the fact that I know what it means. Ron is planning to break up with me.

"I liked a boy in life," says the ghost. "But he ran after Olive Hornby. I haunted him as much as I could, as I did Olive. Ugh, Olive was awful."

I don't want to hear about Olive. But the thing that bothers me the most is that _Moaning Myrtle _is commiserating with me. I would not care to be like her at all. At least I have outlived her in number of years.

It would have been awful to die at fourteen. I wasn't even dating Ron then. Not sure I even liked him back then. But things change. And now he's the one who doesn't seem to like _me_.

I bawl even harder. This is getting extremely difficult to bear. Did any girl ever go through this before in the history of the world? I am sure that none have. No girl could have borne this pain, this needle gutting through my skin. It is like Ron were physically cutting me open, not just tearing me apart emotionally. I want to die.

"I want to die!" I yell out, finally finding my voice.

"Oh trust me, darling, it ain't as fun as it seems from your point-of-view," Myrtle says, patting me on the shoulder. "For one thing, I haven't had rice cakes in ages."

The bathroom door opens, and a blaze of red hair appears there. "Did you say something just now, Lavender?"

My throat clogs up again. The necklace I have given Ron is scintillating around Ginny's neck. I feel a flash of lightning in my head, like I have just awoken from a long period of unconsciousness, and now I am suddenly _aware_.

"Did you feel something just now?" I ask.

"No. It must be your hurt. What's going on?"

"He's ignoring me, Ginny. I know that he's faking that he's sleeping. But I'm crazy about him!" I wail.

"That's not a reason to kill yourself."

"K-kill myself? I n-never said anything of the sort."

"Just now, I heard you say you wanted to die. I thought you were going to throw yourself down the Chamber of Secrets or something."

I grin, not even knowing why. "I couldn't open the faucet if I wanted to," I say. "Can't speak Parseltongue."

"Yeah. I suppose you'd have to ask Harry to do it."

"He wouldn't make it easier for me to commit suicide, would he? I mean, if that were my intention."

"He might just so that you would stop asking him questions about Ron."

We both giggle at that. I knew I had been annoying Harry, but I _had _to find out why Ron was pretending to be asleep when I visited him somehow, didn't I?

I suddenly feel a lot better. "Thanks, Ginny," I say. She helps me to my feet. I see that she has teal nail polish on. It looks so gorgeous with her red hair. I doubt that any girl with a different shade of hair color could pull off nail polish of that hue.

"Now you must promise that you won't kill yourself," Ginny says.

"I could never harm myself, Ginny. I'm safe as a rabbit."

"A close cousin of the rabbits, the lemmings, are known to commit mass suicde," Ginny says, sternly.

"You have my word that I will not participate in any mass suicide pacts," I say.

Ginny extends her hand and we shake on it. She leaves me in the hall, and I feel downhearted. Something about wanting her to stay near, I suppose. Why, I can't fathom. We don't hang out much. Ginny's not my best friend; that's Parvati. Although Parvati is gone since her parents got afraid that she and her twin weren't safe here. As if they don't realize that Hogwarts is the safest place in the wizarding world.

I run into Luna when I emerge from Transfiguration. She says she has a way to get Ron to talk to me. I hope she does. My sweetheart and I need to resume communication. I just hope that Hermione isn't at the infirmary when I arrive.

I walk around the front lawn of the school building for a while, to pass the time. I don't have anything to look forward to if Ron won't speak to me. Kissing him is the best thing I have ever experienced, and I want it to continue. I want our relationship to continue. I want to have him all to myself for the rest of our days. After all, a war is going on. It may not have affected us here at Hogwarts yet (other than the few missing students, like Hannah and Parvati), but it is still going on out there. And as they say, a relationship formed in war must last forever.

I go back to the infirmary and get there just as Luna is leaving. She says Ginny is inside, and for some reason my spirits lift. I enter the infirmary, and there is Ginny, sitting on a chair near her brother's bed. But her brother is pretending to sleep again. In fact, he shut his eyes just as soon as he saw me and then began doing a false snoring sound.

I sit next to Ginny. "Seems your brother is asleep," I say.

"Yeah, he is."

I watch him for a few minutes. Then I say to Ginny, "You know, sometimes you are so crazy about someone that you have to do something crazy to get them to notice you. I called Won-Won's name, wishing him good luck, before that first Quidditch match our House had in November. He didn't know I liked him until then."

"There is such a thing as going too far, though," Ginny saud. "I let Ha—someone I know, know that I liked them from the first. He didn't like me, though. So I decided that the only way to get him to notice me was to start dating. I'm still not sure he has noticed me, but it would be nice if he does."

Every time Ginny says the word "he," I feel a knot in my chest. I wonder what it means. Maybe I have crickets down there.

"If only the person we like can like us back automatically," I say, sighing.

"The land of If Only is a dangerous place," says Ginny.

Some strange words rise to the forefront of my mind. For a moment, I seem to have been thinking that I would like to have Ginny for a girlfriend. But that makes no sense. Am I so desperate for the attention that Ron isn't willing to deliver that I'm visiting fantasies upon his sister?

The air suddenly grows stifling. "I need to go," I say, getting up.

"See you at the game on Saturday," Ginny says.

"Game?" I ask.

"Quidditch," Ginny says.

"Oh, right."

"We do share a common room, so we might see each other before then. And I might see you here when I come and visit Ron. But just in case I don't see you, after the game I'm sure I will."

"You'll be playing in it, won't you?"

"Yes, of course. I am on the Gryffindor team, after all."

"We'll need somewhere else to meet for private conversation," I mutter under my breath.

"What?"

"Nothing! I was just regretting that I wouldn't see you in the stands."

"You'll see me flying about on a broom chasing after the Quaffle. I think that's more productive than chatting in the stands."

I nod, even though I'd still prefer to meet Ginny where there's so much loud noise going on around us that only we can hear each other. I know this is silly because I don't even know what I'd say to Ginny in such a situation, but I still want it to take place.

I leave the infirmary and head toward the library to get some research done for a Divination report on the Delphic oracle. But there I see Hermione, the other kitten trying to steal my man. I do not want to work with her in close vicinity. So I head to the common room. I don't have the materials I need there to do my research, but anything's better than being in the same room with Hermione.

The days pass and Saturday arrives. I think fo not attending the match at first, but then Ginny and I will have nothing to talk about afterwards. That thought depresses me, so I go. I avoid the row where Hermione is sitting, though. Anywhere but there.

Luna is commentating today. She talks about a cloud shaped like a gopher, and another one shaped like a conductor's cap. I kinda like listening to her. Her voice, for one thing, is pleasant to hear, and the things she talks about having a dreamlike quality to them. Of course, I don't understand what she's saying half the time. Weird things about creatures one can't see, it sounds like. I don't know the mojo of it, but if I can't see a creature, it isn't there. Simple as that.

I watch Ginny zoom around the Quidditch field. Her red hair matches her scarlet robes perfectly. If the robes had been pink, she would not have looked that good in them. Though I think I still wouldn't drawn the same amount of pleasure from watching her. She darts around in such a cutesy way. It's breathtaking. I only wish she were down here in the stands with me, so that we could discuss how magnificently she flies.

There is commotion when the big oaf McLaggen, whom I wish Hermione had given more of a chance than one date, so that she wouldn't be hankering after Ron, hits a Bludger in Harry's direction, causing our House's captain to tumble to the ground. At least I have something to talk with Ginny about now. I bet she's steamed.

After the game but before I go to the Great Hall, where the Gryffindors are hanging since we don't want to be in the common room when we've just lost a game, I go to the infirmary. Harry is being put into a bed when I arrive there. Madam Pomfrey screeches at me and says that the infirmary is closed. I look over at Ron, though, as I leave, and see him _holding hands with Hermione_!

I am infuriated. So upset that when I see Ginny, all I can say is, "Too bad about Harry, huh?"

"Yeah, that McLaggen is a tiger."

"So is your brother," I say.

"What?"

"Ignore that," I mutter.

"I will not ignore it," Ginny says, her hand on her hips. "You may be my brother's ex-girlfriend, but I will not have you call him names in my presence."

"But Ginny…"

"Get out of my sight. Now!"

I skulk away, feeling low. Why is everything going so wrong? Ron beng with Hermione is one thing, but when I finally think things are going well between me and Ginny, this rift comes up to tear us apart.

Why do I even care about that redhead anyway? Both redheads, the Weasley siblings. The ones I know well enough, anyway. They're poor and should be beneath my notice. Of course, my mother isn't Ms. Celebrity who has money pouring into her pockets by the pantryload, but still, we aren't in any level of income approaching poverty, like the Weasleys.

Suddenly I loathe myself. I am just trying to justify Ginny's dislike of me by trying to make myself dislike her. But as I watch her yell at McLaggen with all the breath she has in her lungs, I find myself wanting to go over there and place a hand on her shoulder, begging her for forgiveness. But I don't.

And then she's pouring pumpkin juice and talking to Luna. And I get mad again. Ginny talks to everyone, but she doesn't want to talk to me, all because I called her brother a name. But that isn't fair. I'm sure everyone has called Ron names before, even Harry, his best friend! When they're angry at him, that is. And I have a right to be angry at him. He just showed that he is interested in Hermione, not me. What girl _wouldn't _want to call her ex-boyfriend names after that?

I need revenge. On Ron. On Ginny. On everyone who won't love me, even Luna over there. Looking so pretty and not even knowing it. Or maybe I'm just thinking that because she's in close proximity to Ginny.

I see Zacharias Smith sitting at the Hufflepuff table, a checkerboard in front of him. "Shouldn't you be celebrating with the rest of your House?" I ask him as I walk by.

"I'd rather be out here, with the lovely Gryffindor girls like yourself."

I think, _Did he just call me lovely_? And I realize that I must have someone love me, right here, right now, and Zacharias Smith has just made an offer to do just that.

I sit down and wait. He encircles his arm around my waist. And then he's kissing me, hard. I feel like I'm worlds away. It's not that I particularly like his kisses; I don't. It's that he is the only one willing to offer them to me right now, and I have to take where I can get.

I open my eyes slightly as Zacharias kisses me and see Luna run from the Great Hall in tears. I bet Ginny has hurt her, too. Ginny seems to be doing that to a lot of people, lately.

I kiss Zacharias more vehemently, thinking that if Ginny walks by, she'll hate me for this, and then we'll be even. Then we can go back to being borderline friends.

I don't know why, but I want to have some kind of relationship with Ginny. Even one on the farthest outer fringes of friendship. Even a hateful relationship would be all right as long as I am an important sphere in Ginny's mind. Something more than her brother's ex-girlfriend.

I wonder if it's the necklace that has me drawn to her. But whatever it is, my need for her to be in my life is strong. Not just as a passing presence, or passive presence, but as someone active. Active in her love, or active in her hate. At this moment, I don't care which, so long as I mean _something _to her. And so I do this public display with Zacharias Smith, even hoping it will inspire feelings of rage within her on account of her brother's ex being over his being over her so soon afterwards. Muse of Feelings, let me have either Ginny's love or her scorn. I need it.


End file.
